Our August Ceremonial Weekend

O’Shimala ~ Oyates (Scott, Lila, Angela, Amy, Summerlyn, Austin, RoZie(!), Beckie and yours truly) Oyates zani chi cheapalo.

It gives me tremendous joy to share this post and pic of the crew from our August Ceremonial Weekend. O’Shimala - Oyate zani cheapolo translates to ‘Have pity on the people who are praying’, and given the expansive smiles, the shine of everyone’s love light, coupled with some immediate, positive feedback, we were all clearly in receipt. The best weekend of the month is also the hardest weekend of the month, hard in a Good Way, as we formed our mini, supportive community, stated our needs and intentions along with our pain, our loss and suffering, as well as our love and hope and dreams, then ‘Got Low’ as they say in Native America to bring it all into being. In the words of my Rock Man Austin (Powers), here holding my dog RoZie: “We’re one Ceremony away from a breakthrough.”

Of course getting down in the dirt to reach new spiritual heights, access a higher level of healing, higher than any feeble, fundamentalist ‘religion of the mind’ can offer, while at the same time gaining true, reliable resources in the face of death takes work, commitment, and courage. And this group had it in spades. We enjoyed a beautiful, uplifting summer ‘round here that had its equal share of challenges, and now have an eye on an even more elevated Fall. Of course there’s always our Meditation + Mindfulness 101 class this coming weekend, also soon available for registration Saturday, September 18th, along with a Saturday, September 25th Mushroom hunt with the mighty Anthony Michael Blowers, our quickly filling Fall Noble Silence Meditation Retreat Weekend October 1st-3rd, and other retreats posting soon. Remember too, that there’s always time and space for you here for a private visit. Speaking of that killer feedback, here’s Lilla’s lovely take on our recent gathering:

“The Higher Haven is a beacon of light in the darkness, a waypost for tired travellers seeking refreshment and new understanding, new connections and community. The tidiness, cleanliness, but also raw natural beauty of the retreat space mirrors the beautiful balance struck by the retreat itself, between finding chaos in order, and order in chaos. Every wanderer's journey is a different one, so I cannot promise you the nature of your individual results, but I encourage anyone searching for greater meaning and spiritual connection to visit the Higher Haven once in a lifetime. Many workshops and retreats promise a new start or fresh perspectives, but this was the first such event where I felt an actual "reset" of such cosmic proportions. Great magic dwells at the Haven quietly waiting to bless those who come in hope and good faith.”

Our Summer Noble Silence Meditation Retreat (NSMR) Weekend

What’s this latest happening? After going back in time, thundering over the steppes of The Great American Plains in previous posts, recalling some of the Ceremonial training and teachings behind The Higher Haven, we dove deep into our Summer Noble Silence Meditation Retreat (NSMR) this past weekend. This retreat combines our monthly Meditation & Mindfulness 101 class with practice periods of sitting and walking meditation, free time to relax, read, write or walk about, a bit of Yin Yoga (per our group’s childs’ pose above), and an overall refraining from speech. After only a day or two of fostering stillness, the tranquility becomes tangible, deeply touching us all. “The Higher Haven Noble Silence Retreat is a restorative experience unlike any other I've experienced,” said Tracy. “The gentle, mindful, honest approach Paul takes to teaching technique is a balm for any soul searching for care and quiet acceptance of their practice.”

According to Robert Weir, author of Journey - People, Places and Ponderings, pictured above with arms as wide as the world on a walking meditation inspired by teacher Thích Nhất Hạnh, our Summer NSMR proved to be, “Far beyond five stars. Paul Tootalian, the facilitator, presented a beautiful combination of Buddhist Vipassana meditation and indigenous way-of-life traditions while also honoring Christianity, Judaism, and Islam. Paul organized the weekend well: starting simply and working logically toward greater knowledge and understanding of deep meditation.His guidance provided the means for each of us to tune into our individual self—our unique feelings, images and self-talk—and customize our “sits” and “walks” to our singular situations. This he augmented with beautiful singing of Ceremonial spiritual songs.”

“Then there was the silence … the beautiful silence. No talking from Friday evening through Sunday afternoon … with plenty of physical and energetic space for the seven participants to be alone in our individual thoughts and readings within a peaceful, communal environment of a lovely guesthouse and expansive, grassy property. I set five difficult goals and met them all. For that, I am grateful and joyful and blessed.” We echo Robert’s serene sentiment, happily announcing our Fall NSMR for the weekend of October 1 - 3, with registration and information up shortly, along with our entire Fall 2021 schedule, offering some surprisingly cool new retreats + Yoga’s triumphant return. Stay attuned and we’ll see you soon ~ Toksha

The Way of the Contrary

There he is — the man, the medicine man, the Yuwipi Man and head Heyoka, the Sun Dancer and ancestral Chief, showing his true colors of yellow and black, Spotted Owl feathers adorning his ceremonial skirt, a split lightning bolt contrarian symbol etched upon his face, chest and beaded eagle wing fans. Wičháša Ithánčhan Tatanka Weitgo, also known as Phil, here captured in his tipi, the Lakota word for the place of abiding, would soon emerge the masked sacred clown to throw down, rolling about and turning the Wi-wanyang-wa-c’i-pi wakan or sacred Sun Dance Ceremony upside down, in the summer of 2003. “Chief… Phil… Crazybull…”, echoed Uncle Leonard’s baritone shout over the PA. “Is he a man?” Or is he… something else entirely?”

I don’t own many Phil photos, this very special one coming my way after finishing the former post, a piece prompted by the passing of his teacher and Uncle, Chief Leonard Emmanuel Crow Dog. During the pandemic, we visited how crisis can be good for you, referencing my funky Heyoka tutelage. Those were the best of times, those breezy summers almost twenty years back, way out on America’s wild, western plains, from my home-base in Cave Creek, Arizona, to Phil’s in Albuquerque, New Mexico, to the land of his tribe, the Brulé or Burnt-Thigh Sicangu people of Rosebud, South Dakota. If you knew Phil well, he’s appearing quite the robust, eternally youthful Shaman here, full of strength and endurance. A stroke and other physical complications struck soon after that summer, turning the best of times into the worst. And all that clowning — the somersaults, the yanking of female dancers’ ponytails, the masks and creative, otherworldly costumes coupled with weitgo (crazy) antics that filled his people with laughter, dread, hope and healing — was gone less than three years later. “What lasts in life Nephew?” Phil asked in one of our last conversations. “Love,” I replied, “Love lasts. My love for you.” “No, no. Love can turn to hate”, he offered up, in his final contrarian teaching on the duality of life in the material world.

Yet almost twenty years up the Red Road, my affection for and devotion to Phil continues , as do all our relations with loved ones. Life took an unexpected zig the first time I shook his hand. Then a few years later, having received a flickering flash of my own future, both life and death, it simply didn’t make sense to build anything on the constantly shifting sands of the material world, but rather on the rock of the world to come. Ceremonial living and spiritual purification are not easy roads because life is not an easy road. Ergo we orchestrate an equally arduous situation in Ceremony, utilizing heat or cold or water deprivation in order to feel along the boundaries of being in a body, turning life’s difficult nature around, leveraging suffering to liberate our spirits from the the confines of matter. It’s a beautiful road and one helluva journey, elevating one’s self on a path that ascends upward, becoming better and better over time. That’s why I uphold The Higher Haven to be heaven’s front porch, a clearing for the healing of many, on a level that Phil’s teaching deserved, with the only requirements for tribal membership being significant effort and unwavering commitment to one’s own Path.

“To carry and honor a Pipe is to understand death, commitment, integrity, courage and love,” according to Chief Phil. “And if you were to study the Inipi (or Ceremony), it will take you your lifetime” With so much coming to pass in the light of Phil’s guidance and predictions for my life, I’m recalling my own vision for our future, fondly reminding him that and if we stuck together, he wouldn’t be lying his star quilts down in the mud of the Tucson Gem Show. “We’re taking this over the Haŋwí (the Moon)”, I’d happily inform him, so inspired by the individual, creative self-expression around Ceremony. While true that my plan to be his assistant and acquaint the whole world with my real Indian Chief of a Teacher looks slightly different than originally planned, he’s still by my side, and vice-versa. But isn’t that life? Moving and evolving while we try and hold to our little plans.

Here’s what the Oyates, the people who attended our recent Way of the Contrary weekend had to say - “All my relations! I found the right words to speak out loud and make my inner child feel heard! Thank you Paul and Phil’s Spirit . This has been a wondrous gift to slowly unwrap. Peace be with all who take this step into wellness.” - L.G. “Thank you for finding us. I feel an openness, freeness, and connection to life that has been missing for too long.” - S.W. “Chi-Migwech (Anishinaabemowin or Ojibwa for “Big Thank You”) for such a beautiful and uplifting evening. So grateful for the reassurance that the Creator and Spirit exist within me. I look forward to my next Ceremony.” On that note, the next Way of The Contrary Weekend will be August 13th-14th. Two spots just reopened for our Summer Noble Silence Meditation Retreat Weekend this coming weekend. And the full Fall schedule, including the triumphant return of yoga, will be up before July is out. We’ll also have some special information coupled with client testimonials on what happens at The Higher Haven between retreat weekends. We hope you’re making the most of your Summer 2021 and look forward to seeing you soon. Aho Matakuye O’yasin!